Something borrowed

At this very moment I am watching the movie "something borrowed" and i am overwhelmed by the amount of affairs that happen on tv. I am scared that I am going to be one of those women. The one who messes with marriages, one who has to watches a relationship with someone married-- and be the one sleeping secretly with the husband.  ----Being stuck in this place where you have nothing but a secret to hold onto, and lots and lots of hurt in the mix. 

I'm not confessing to any affair or a desire to have one-- I feel like I should make that clear. 

But I see how easy it can be in one, how easy it is to keep it up. How easy it is to become so deeply hurt in that. 

I have become very careful with any of my friend's husbands. I have become careful with bosses, and really any married men in my life. 

I have a family member who is 5 years older than me who is now living with the guy she had an affair with. My mom told me this today, and she really likes the guy,  he is WAY better to her and her kids than my brother ever was. 

But it just emphasis how many affairs go on. I hate the secrecity of it. I hate how we are taught not to take people at their word. That what we see going on, is often not what is actually is going on in life. Sure i love it in movies-you get the birds eye view, know ALL the secrets going on-- but real life, it hurts. A lot!