Sundays news:
Ham just stopped talking to me like 2 weeks ago... And it pissed me off, no fight, no real warning... He was just gone.. So I had a hundred different theories of why, I felt hurt in this weird way, and I decided that I needed to talk to him about it, and in this conversation I was willing to get fully honest and even let it be a little ugly. Before I texted him I went on a hike to pray about whst I was doing. (That's where my blog fail btw) and in this I prayed for our conversation and that my words and his words and both of our hearts would be good. So I had all this build-up and then his really easy conversation with ham.. I would say too easy, but he assured me that we are good, and that his knee has made him antisocial-- there's no ifs ands or buts about it. Our relationship has changed. But I'm not cut out, and that's all I need for now. Saying that it's sounds desperate, and it is... But I don't want forever love and romance with him now. I want him to be my friend and help me feel normal and network with other normal ppl and have someone who listens that is on my side yet not always agree with me. Ham challenges me and teaches me so much about real life like no one else has. I trust him with my real identity, he is so good for me. But I have learned these past few weeks he doesn't want a romantic relationship with me, which really really makes me not want one with him!
So in-conclusion, ham and I are good for the moment, we will see how long that lasts and def no romance.
Big news #2:
My awful boss will no longer be my boss and that the boss I really respect will take that job over, make the position amazing and hand it over to me after his time of improving it.
Umm... Yeah this is way bigger than the ham news... But I haven't fully processed it. I am terrified at failing at being guest service coordinator. I don't want to deal with all the hard stuff. My old boss and I are basically switching jobs, pretty sure I'll have to train her on campfinance-- that will be so awkward and hard!! I kinda freak out thinking about it. It's going to be really hard and stretching for me. I'm glad I have time to switch into this role, oh man... I really need to improve on my leadership skills NOW!
Also I spilt red wine on my friends whitr carpet tonight.. That really sucks!!
