Burned-out Wednesday

"Burn-out-- I am burned-out." Was the thought that replayed in my head over and over again as I sat in Staff devo today. It wasn't really a devo, it was a lecture about how we as a staff suck. Really, it was about how we fail at customer service, it's about how we put ourselves first instead of everyone else. That we need to give more serve more. We need to be pumping our time with God, be in the word--- that being far from God is making us selfish and suck as a staff.

There were so many true things in this talk, but I didn't want to listen. I feel like I am being pulled to be so many different things right now that I am over hearing it.

Dreams, and reality--move with courage

I think I have been losing this past month. Losing the core of my identity. It has been a hard time for me. But I go through A LOT of hard times. No big change has been made, I explored big changes, but I am where I am. 

I think I am losing more and more of me. I feel like I am just going through the motions and trying my best to not let anyone know that I am losing it (including myself) but as I sit here today, I think it is very true. 

I knew I wanted to write today, I just didn't want to write the same thing that I have written a hundred times. (something that I struggle with since I feel like I have been stuck in a hard place for such a long time now) so I went back and read, went back to all the times I have written before.