Women's Bible Study

So somehow I went from rebelling women's Bible study to one who attends two a week. I have accepted that I'm older, that I do geeky things that my mom does, that I mocked and made fun of her for years. But today, I'm having a really hard time shallowing being a women's bible study girl. 

I'm okay with the one I do at my church, it has become a little more cheesy as time has gone by, but I still love it, and good things have come out of it. 

Tonight, we started a women's Bible study at camp--- it's the now a true stereo type of group... More cheese than I can handle... Many people who are not real, that I don't trust and don't think that it would be wise TO trust them. 

My roommate who very meanly dissed this group not even a week ago is going to be apart of this, and I really don't want to be in the same group as her, I don't trust her at all. She is very consistent rude to EVERYONE and makes everyone accept that because she is an "introvert" 

That's crap-- and I don't know why or how everyone goes along with all the crap she pulls.. It really makes me mad.

Other people are just better people than I am, and can show love. I feel burned-out from her, I know that we are to forgive when people wrong us. But what do you do with people who always act like this girl? I feel like you can't forgive a person for being a person you can't stand to be around, who is in every area of your life, but won't even say "hi" to you or anyone else who she encounters. I feel like that's not something that "needs forgiveness" because it wasn't a direct wrong towards me. But isn't someone I want to spend my life around or with. How do you handle dealing with someone that their presence makes you angry? 

I didn't intend to write on that at all. Tangent over:

This bible study, will actually be good homework, buy I'm really worried about our weekly gatherings. 

I think there is a lot of hidden self amougths this group. I think there are a lot of differences, in writing this post I see that I have a harder heart than I realized--that I have a lot of things that I really really need to work on. 

Though I don't like this--it will be really really good for me. 

Ps I wrote this last Thursday, but i had a hard time accepting how awful my heart is and had to wait until today to show my true colors. Being real is head, both internally and externally.