Sunday, June 21, 2015

Band at camp

The last 2 weeks there was a band at camp. This band contained 2 single guys my age. My boss became best friends with them- I had a few conversations with them, but overall I more had awkward moments with them. I thought one guy was fairly good looking, and I became very self-concious when he was around. In a way that I could tell he was paying attention from a distance. And in that I paid attention to him--
The band had a mob of summer staff fans, I didn't really want to get into that, so I felt like I almost rudely ignored them often. But in that mix, I had super random short conversations with on of them. -- One day he asked me how my morning hike was-- I didn't tell him ever about hiking, he just learned it in conversation with my boss or his wife-- and today he told me that he learned all about me from my boss. In a "I-wanna-connect-with-you-way" but never talked to me again. Sat away from me at dinner (this conversation started in line for dinner) 
Now, I'm not scheming my way into his life, but it was just a lot of awkward conversation and situations that I can't figure out. I can't handle the not knowing. I don't like not-knowing his intentions, I just want to know if he was or wasn't interested-- I want meaning to explain all the situations. And I'll most likely never get it. I just need to move on and make conversations better with the new group at camp. 

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