Boat Loaded with Stress: it may be sinking

Finances within my job have been causing me ample amounts of stress. A $40,000 plus group cancelled their retreat last minute-- nothing I can do about it, it's just our lost. The autumn was already really far behind and now, well.. we are in trouble; and I am taking it VERY VERY personally. 

I am failing at my job. I suck and because of it, the camp can potentially crumble. It's not all my fault. I learned that today, but a lot of it is. ALOT! I don't know how to fix it. 

Minimum wage just went up, which  means that the rate of camp just went up, which means it will be harder to book groups at the new price point. And we are at a point where we need lots of new campers. 

I work in an very active and busy place, and today with all the stress that was in my head and the constant need for EVERYONE to stop and have small talk with me. I nearly lost it. I was SO MAD. I can't handle all this stress and issues and no time to work on wrapping my mind around it or make steps in fixing the problem. 

I am not good enough to do this all. I am failing BIG TIME and very very publicly. It's painful, it's hard. 

I work in the business side of a ministry, and that in a way is confusing. Prayer is a  big part of what we do here, and for sure praying for the fiances of camp has become a real prayer. 

Praying and dreaming for 120 person movie crew to stay at camp for 3 weeks, that brings in $200,000.00. That would change everything. Everything. I have smaller prayers/dreams as well. A 4-day school group of 100, times three. Phone calls from people ready to book anywhere we have gaps really.

This specific journey maybe the end of me, or a time that I become refined and sharpened, the unsureness of the results makes it hard to move forward boldly.